Becoming Proud of What I’ve Accomplished
Updated: Jul 5, 2020
Lately, I have been pretty hard on myself, maybe even harder than ever before. I have been feeling pretty down about what I have done with my life so far. My friends have graduated college, gotten jobs in their fields, gotten married, had kids, and I have been standing still for the last 5 years. Feeling this way has brought me to examine what I have accomplished in life so far and how I feel about it. After weeks of trying to sort my feelings out, I realized that I am proud of myself. Maybe I haven’t graduated college and maybe I’m too sick to work, but that doesn’t mean my accomplishments have been lesser than what my friends have achieved. While I was sorting out my feelings, I made a list of my accomplishments. My list had 26 different accomplishments on it, some of them being very insignificant, but the following are the things I’m most proud of.
1. That I’m still alive
2. That I haven’t let being sick turn me bitter
3. That I have helped other people suffering from Mitochondrial Disease
This list might not seem significant to you, but it is to me and I will explain why. First is the fact that I’m still alive. This might seem like a ridiculous thing to be on my list, but it would have been so easy to give up during some of the difficult things I’ve had to endure. I have to make the decision to live every single day. Every time I take my meds (29 pills daily+ rescue meds I take when I’m symptomatic), I decide to live. Every time I hook up my infusion, go to a doctor’s appointment, or have surgery, I make the decision that I want to live. I fight for my life every day, and because I fight, I am still here.
Next is the fact that I haven’t let being sick turn me bitter. I’ve met a lot of bitter people over my life time, some of them had better cards dealt to them than I have, and some have had it way worse. I understand that everyone has hardships in life and I most definitely have moments when I am far from pleasant to be around, but overall, I still have a positive outlook on life. I have hope that my future will be better than today and I don’t let all the suffering in my life turn me cynical. I don’t know what it is that makes someone bitter, but I like to believe that we all have control over it.
The third accomplishment I’m proud of is that I have helped other people suffering from Mitochondrial Disease. I have taken my experiences, good and bad, and used them to help people going through similar things. I’ve offered advice, insight, or sometimes just a listening ear to people who’ve needed it. I’ve been a friend that can empathize and sometimes that’s all you need to get through the low points. I’ve managed to take something bad and make something good out of it, and I think that’s something to be proud of.
Maybe I haven’t had these grand accomplishments in my life like a lot of my friends have, but that doesn’t lessen the value of my accomplishments. So in the future, my goal is to be a little kinder to myself and stop comparing my journey to others. Who knows, maybe it will make my life a little brighter.